Flashbacks
by Ambrey
Summary: Tobi's starting to get his memory back. no pairings HIATUS
1. Chapter 1

_Ambrey:  
I'm writing this in first person from Tobi's perspective, which seems to be somewhat of a rarity in fanfictions. Even more unusually, I treat Tobi as more than just comic releif, if only in this fic. So... This probably isn't what you're used to. I hope you like it anyways, though. :D  
_

_Notes: This fic may contain spoilers, and supports the ObiTobi/Tobito theory. So far, there's not too much rough language, but there might be eventually. Same goes for violence and pairings. I've no intention to turn this into a romantic fic, but pairings may be mentioned. Lastly, the chapters are going to be very, very short, most of them under one page long. I hate waiting for updates in fics and I assume that you do, too. I hope you do, at least, because I'm keeping the chapters short and to-the-point for the sake of faster updates. xD  
_

_About the fic: I started this over the summer, due to extreme boredom and an obsessive love for Tobi. I made a rule for myself that I would never write a Naruto fanfic, but, well, rules are made to be broken...  
_

_Comments will be much appreciated. Let me know if you'd rather have longer chapters (even with less frequent updates) or if you like it how it is. I don't mind changing._

_I hope you enjoy!_

_EDIT: I realized that I hadn't mentioned the time setting for this. Akatsuki are post-timeskip, Konoha is pre-timeskip. Sorry for any confusion/weirdness. It was going to be post-timeskip, but I wanted Sasuke there, and I wanted the kids to be, well, kids. _

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Uchiha Obito.

I know that name from somewhere.

I'm not really sure - It just pops up in my mind sometimes. It's like when you're trying to remember a word while you're talking, and then two hours later, you randomly think of the word and wonder why.

Well, maybe that only happens to me.

That name comes up in a dream, too. This one dream that I've had like fifty times. It's not like those repetitive dreams where you think through the whole thing "okay, this is where I run down the neverending hallway… and here's the door… and, oh yeah, that's where the tentacles start growing out of my eye socket…".

It's an oddly real one, like some kind of phantom memory. When I wake up from it, I have this weird feeling that I'm missing something. I'm used to waking up wondering why my left eye doesn't open with my right, or why only my right side feels the heat of the sun shining through the window on me; this is something more than a phantom limb. I know it's something major, I just can't place what it is.

And whatever it is, I know I've lost it. I can't console myself by thinking I lost it for a good reason, feel vengeful towards whatever asshole took it - I can only know that, somehow, something's gone and I'm incomplete.

Anyways, in the dream, my vision is blurred. Maybe by tears or maybe smoke, or it could be the dust on the goggles I'm wearing. In the dream, I don't even question the goggles. I guess they're normal to the dream-me. I can see out of both my eyes, but it's not a shock; that, too, is normal to me in the dream.

The goggles are cracked on one side. I somehow know that there's rocks or a boulder or something heavy on my left side, pinning me down. I'm not looking down, so I can't see, but I know I'm bleeding. Something in the back of my mind tells me that being crushed like this should hurt, but it doesn't. I guess the nerves on that side are shutting down.

Above me, I can see eyes staring down at me, dark and scared-looking. The person watching me is a friend, I think. In the dream I think of two things when I see his masked face - 'best friend' and 'bastard' at the same time.

I'm not shocked or surprised to see him. I want to say something to him, but I don't. Instead, I just listen. There's silence, and I can hear him breathing but not myself, I guess I'm not breathing anymore…

Then it starts getting dark, and I can hear him say Obito's name, telling either me or Obito or both of us to wake up, stop being a selfish dumbass and think of the mess I'm leaving him and Rin in, and then finally that he's sorry, but it doesn't work and I fade to black anyways.

And then, every time when I wake up, I have that feeling of missing something important.


	2. Chapter 2

_Ambrey: With school, I'm really at my breaking point... One hour of sleep last night. xD I'm tired... And we're out of coffee... Ugh. I've got some chapters written in advance, though, so it's only a matter of a few clicks for me to update._

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The dream starts to get frustrating after awhile. It's been months, and the dream has stayed just as infuriatingly vague as ever. I was trying to interpret it, but I just can't figure it out. Was he calling me Obito? Or is there someone else, also stuck down under the rocks? I don't know. In the dream, I don't turn my head or see anything except the masked face and the sky, and a few green things in the corner of my eye that I assume to be trees.

And after all, dreams are just the way the brain sorts out the waking life. Maybe I'm just crushed by some kind of responsibility, as heavy as boulders, and need help before it's too late?

Problem is, I don't have any white-haired, mask-wearing friends, and I don't know my relatives…

Wait.

White hair. Where did _that_ come from? I had never noticed it in the dream.

And so the dream has changed, just a little bit.

-----

Leader gave us a new mission today. We're to find more information about the Nine-Tails, but not get in any fights or cause a big fuss. I don't see quite how he expects Deidara not to get into any fights, but I suppose Deidara-senpai and I are less attention-getting than the shark guy and the man that all of Konohagakure hates.

To avoid being discovered as Akatsuki, neither of us is wearing a cloak or uniform, and Deidara's got his clay hidden. I still have my mask on, but when we get closer to civilization, I'll take it off. We have a pretty twisted route to avoid being tracked, so we're not going to be around people enough for me to be too worried about somebody recognizing the mask.

Deidara's pissed that we can't use one of his birds to fly, but I don't mind walking. I've learned that, if you fall off the back of his bird, he doesn't try very hard to turn around and catch you.

-----

The dream's changed again.

In the newer version of the dream, it's his fault I'm under the rocks; he's about to get crushed and I push him so that the rocks fall on me instead. But the fact of the matter is that I did it on instinct and, now that I realize what I've just done, I'm not entirely sure.

And then I wake up, feeling just as lost as ever.

-----

I think we're about halfway to Konohagakure now. We're walking past a few little houses and villages, so we've taken off our headbands, and Deidara's wearing gloves so as not to scar any unsuspecting civilians for life.

He says the leather tastes weird, but this way he doesn't have to be as careful about touching things. He's always seemed to me to be a little obsessive, refusing to touch anything that somebody's sneezed on. You should see him around flu season.

I never thought about why, though. Nearly everyone in the Akatsuki has problems; I figured OCD was his.

He asks me if I'd lick a doorknob.

"Of course not. Those things are covered in germs and who knows what else."

"Exactly."

We're silent for a few minutes, walking, and I realize that I'm still wearing my mask. I take it off, finally able to feel the cool forest's air on my skin. The mask blocks my sense of smell, and I'm glad to smell the familiar scent of trees and wildlife. Anything smells good after wearing a wooden mask for days.

Under the mask, I'd bandaged the part of my face with the most freakish scars, and am wearing an eye patch. Still, I know that a few scars are uncovered. Every time Deidara sees me without the mask, he looks a little disturbed.

Sometimes I think he's forgotten that I have a face.


	3. Chapter 3

_Ambrey: Well, we've restocked on coffee, and it's the weekend... Which is some definite good news. I've already got some of the next few chapters written, and I'll write more tonight. All you all have to worry about is my finding the time to post them during the schoolweek. xD _

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Neither of us has depth perception, but I know my vision's better than Senpai's. I can tell the village is in the distance, and the trees are starting to look familiar.

I wonder why I know this place. I haven't been to Konoha often, but it feels like I've spent half my life there.

Deidara says he thinks we're lost. He hasn't noticed yet that we're almost there, and he hasn't recognized the little green glimmer in the distance that I somehow know is a war memorial. I can see it through the trees, just barely. I don't know why I know what it is, but something draws me to it, and that name, Obito, comes up in my mind again.

I'm walking faster, Deidara struggling to keep up behind me, and the green glimmer is now a cutout view of a stone. And then it's recognizable as the memorial, and I'm just a few feet away from it. I see a person standing in front of it, tall with a jounin vest, but I'm not paying attention to them because I've got my eyes set on the sculpture.

Sun glints off its green-black surface, light catching on the edges of the shapes carved into its surface. The stone's covered in names. All of these people are dead, and I'm shocked to see that a small village's list of casualties is this long. I scan through the names, in awe at the sheer number of them, until something catches my eye.

Uchiha Obito.

I almost miss it, but it's right there. There's many other names; I can see Umino and a few other Uchihas surrounding it, but Obito holds my attention.

Deidara asks what's so interesting about such a plain sculpture, and I say I'll be with him in a minute. I guess he can't see the names from the edge of the clearing where he's standing. He tells me to come on, but when I walk away from the stone memorial, that stranger that was standing near the stone looks at me. Our eyes connect in an awkward silence.

I don't know if you've ever experienced the awkward quiet of a graveyard, but it's something like that. Like when somebody's kneeled in front of a grave while you walk by, and you don't know whether to just keep going or to apologize for intruding.

There's some sort of faint recognition in his eye when he looks at me, like he might know me from somewhere. He looks like he's about to say something to me.

But then Deidara spazzing at me about something or other, tellimg me we have to hurry up.

I nod to the stranger and leave with Deidara.


	4. Chapter 4

We don't really have much information about the jinchuuriki right now, but that can't be helped. It's getting kind of late. There's nobody out in the streets to follow, and besides, we haven't seen anybody who knows the jinchuuriki in hours. Deidara gives up for the day.

I give Deidara some half-assed excuse and head out to the memorial again. Maybe that man from the day before will be there again. I could ask him about the jinchuuriki…

Oh, who am I kidding? I want to see if he's there to ask about Uchiha Obito.

-----

He's there. He's lost in thought, though.

And maybe I don't want to ask, after all. I read through the names on the stone again and again, seeing if something will jump out at me the way Obito's name does. A few other Uchiha names have a weird familiarity to them. It's sort of like looking through an old yearbook.

I scan over the names again. I don't know why I didn't realize this before, but there's a lot of names. More than there should be. Konoha's a thriving village, but it's not exactly a metropolis. In a non-ninja city of this size, it would be unthinkable for that many people to die. Yet, here, all of these casualties are just from fighting, never mind disease, aging, and accidental injury.

I shudder to think what a family must be like here. It's probably not uncommon for a child to grow up without parents…

But I try to make myself think that at least the children get to remember their family members as heroes who died for a cause. That's better than remembering their parents' aging decay or watching their siblings grow old and dull.

Me, I don't remember my parents at all. I know the obvious things, mostly genetic - that at least one of them had dark hair, and they probably both had light skin. I could guess the basics of what they looked like. Admittedly, though, I haven't tried very hard to imagine what my family was like.

I think that it's a good thing I don't remember most of my life. Psychologically, the mind tends to block off things that are too traumatizing to remember. Since my memory's missing in so many places, I guess I haven't had a very easy life. If it's that bad, I'd rather not know about it.

I'm reading over the names again, trying not to pull up any hidden memories. Every once in a while some weird little scene pops up in my mind and confuses me for the rest of the day. I try to make them fit into a storyline but it just doesn't work.

The list of names isn't as distracting as I'd hoped it would be. Try as I might, I can't make myself pay attention to the letters on the stone; I keep spacing out and thinking too much. And thinking about not thinking while remembering not to remember is giving me a headache.

Something brings me back to reality, but I'm not sure what until I hear it again.

"Are you alright?"

That's normally a question I'd answer with an offhanded 'fine' or 'don't worry about it' but then I realize that my hands are shaking.

It takes a while for me to get out a reply. "I think so. Yeah."

I think that maybe it'd be a good idea to look away from the memorial, since it's probably what's making me go all weird, but the moment I look up my eyes lock on his.

Bad idea.

The world spins. Or falls, or shakes, or however you want to describe it. All I know is that the ground's out from under my feet and the trees that were standing up straight are leaning in towards me. My eye stays locked on his but it's getting hard to focus…

Then it all goes black.

-----

I feel like I'm underwater, though I can't even see the surface. It's all black down here.

Something's spiraling around me. At first I think it's fish, then I recognize little moving pictures. I don't move, but then I realize that I seem to still have hands and feet and eyes. I reach out to touch one of the swimming memories, and my hand grasps nothing.

So, since that's not getting me anywhere, I stay where I am and watch them. Something tells me I should hurry, but I'm so calm down here. It's an odd sort of peace, and I'm reluctant to leave.

I watch the scenes again. Scenes of somebody's life drift through the water, which might be something else, something more like colorless blood or liquid memories, but I'll call it water for now. I can see a family, most of them tall and dark-haired like myself. Another scene shows some sort of fire jutsu and red eyes like Itachi's.

Then a big wall-sized screen is in front of me, and I can't stop myself from trying to lean closer to see what's happening. The water's gotten murky, blurring my vision. I lean closer to see..

But I'm too close, and before I know it, the scene's sucked me in and my world fades to black again.


	5. Chapter 5

_OMIGOSHI'MSOBUSYSORRY. GSLKHALKSHDkldfhasdkfh. Newspaper class plus Honors English III equals LETHAL COMBINATION OF HOMEWORK HELL. _

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I open my eye as slightly as possible, and the sun instantly blinds me. I'm still trying to get a grip on where I am and what just happened.

"Definitely not alright." The same voice from a moment ago speaks. I can tell I'm on the ground; I guess I passed out or something. Something - maybe the dull ache in my head, or the way the world feels like it's spinning - tells me not to even bother trying to sit up for at least a couple minutes.

"You probably shouldn't try to move…" he says. "If you don't mind my asking… what the hell just happened?"

"I… blacked out?"

"For no reason?"

"I dunno."

I realize I'm feeling almost normal again, and sit up. The headache's gone away, too, and I'm not quite so dizzy. I'm just trying not to look at the stone or his eye.

He asks if I want to be taken to the hospital, or at least to a doctor. After all, I could be brain-damaged or something. I'm not sure if he's joking or not about the last part.

I want to say yes, but… A doctor would probably want to know my name. Considering I don't seem to have one aside from Zetsu's nickname of Tobi, that'd be hard. And a doctor could find out that I'm in Akatsuki, and that I'm probably going to help ruin his village eventually, and that I'm on not-unfriendly terms with Uchiha Itachi…

"No, I'll be fine in a minute, I think." I say.

Even in my current state, I can recognize an awkward moment.

A few seconds later, I think I can stand up. But he's watching me, and though I can't see much of his face, I can tell he's worried. I can't decide if it's creepy or nice for a random stranger to actually care about my wellbeing. Usually, they just back off the second they see the cloak and uniform. I never thought about it, but I guess that outside of Akatsuki, I'm not a very threatening person.

After all, I don't have a fricking venus flytrap on my shoulders, or blue skin. I look almost normal, I think, aside from the obvious bandages and scars…

I'm about to say that I'll probably be fine now and thank him for his concern when another person appears in the clearing. Sitting up, I see a young boy watching the jounin. The white-haired man looks up to him, as if alerted to his presence by some unspoken signal.

"Sakura and Naruto can wait a little, Sasuke." The jounin says.

I startle at the mention of Naruto.

The child, whose name is apparently Sasuke, remains silent. He's looking at me now, somewhat confused. Like the jounin did before, he has a look of faint recognition, like I resemble somebody he used to know.

"Are they causing trouble or something?"

I'm starting to think that kid is mute. He hasn't verbally responded to the jounin at all yet, but somehow the man seems to understand him. The boy nods.

"You all should be old enough to be trusted on your own by now." He sounds half disappointed, half amused. "After all, it's only helping clean up the Academy."

"Naruto went into Iruka-sensei's office." The boy, apparently, isn't mute.

The jounin looks slightly concerned. "Did he do something he shouldn't have?"

"He set off a bomb or something. I heard the screams."

"I'll be there, then." He sighs. He turns to me. "Will you be alright?"

"I think so." I say.

Then the older ninja gets up and follows the boy out of the clearing. He glances back at me a couple of times, apparently still not sure that I'm okay.

-----

Walking back to the hotel later, I realize two things. First off, I'm fine, and apparently passed out for no reason.

And there's another name stuck in the back of my mind.

Hatake Kakashi.

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_Author's notes: Iruka used bombs in the fight against Mizuki, and I haven't noticed a lot of other ninjas doing this. Though I wouldn't guess that it's his specialty, he probably has a few in his office. And, considering he would want to keep his students' records and stuff safe, he would probably have some sort of security system - some sort of security system which Naruto would be magnetically drawn to, as Naruto seems to be talented in getting himself into trouble._

_Also, Kakashi's not being irresponsible in my opinion. Obito's said repeatedly he's fine, and for all Kakashi knows, Naruto and Sakura could have been blown up or something. He has priorities. Idiot students over random, weirdly familiar strangers._


	6. Chapter 6

_LSKHDAFlksdhfalkfhasdpfihovhnwlakherlskhfdasdf.!!! The world (specifically, school) is made of fail._

_That's all I have to say with this chapter. Sorry this is moving more slowly than I planned... But hey, I'm not going on hiatus or giving up. It's against my rules._

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I get back to the hotel to find the lights still on.

_Oh, no_.

This could either mean one of two things.

First, it could mean that Deidara's ticked off because I'm getting back late. Ticked off because I got him worried, and he doesn't like that, because being worried forces him to acknowledge that he actually cares about another living being.

Second, it could mean that Deidara's just up late for some reason. He's either working on art, or dropping artwork from the hotel room's window into the nearby gardens for "public display". I learned very quickly that, when Deidara gets bored in large cities, he has ways to entertain himself.

Either way, I prepare myself for pain.

-----

Deidara is surprisingly not-murderous.

"Tobi, you have grass stuck to your face, un." He says, and leaves it at that, waiting for me to explain.

I don't.

"Some local girl put up more of a fight than you'd expected?" He deadpans, but I can see him trying not to snicker. His ability to laugh at his own wit is _not_ his most endearing feature.

"That's not what happened."

"Local guy, then?" Okay, now it's getting annoying. He's got that bright shine in his eye where he knows he's onto something. It seems odd to call a grown man mischievous, but I suppose it's also even more odd to call Deidara a grown man.

"Nope."

"Local transvestite?"

"Nope."

"Livestock?"

"Has it occurred to you that, despite being an Akatsuki member, I actually have better things to do than rape and pillage in my free time?"

"WOAH. Unexpected coherency, un." Still with the impish look, he's studying me, trying to figure out what just happened.

Aside from forgetting I have a face, I think sometimes he forgets I have a brain.

He looks like he's finally lit on a conclusion as to why I'm making sense. "Who are you, really?"

"I'm Tobi."

"Real name?"

"Remember? I don't know my real name. Tobi's what Zetsu called me."

He pauses. "Wait, really? I thought you knew it, un… Why wouldn't Zetsu tell you?"

"I dunno. Because he's a friggin' venus flytrap?" I'm hoping the usual stupidity will get him to stop being annoying.

"Okay, you're Tobi, un. I think. For now." He's somewhat joking, but still suspicious. He thinks for a few moments. "Hey, if you're really Tobi, where'd I set up that, er, _art show_ two weeks ago?"

"Into a group of schoolchildren. None of them were injured. I wouldn't have laughed if any of them were…"

"Liar, un. But, you're Tobi, I'm pretty sure. Nobody else would remember that, un."

It's weird that he trusts my memory, even after I've just admitted to not knowing my own name.

Oh, well. He knows more than I do, I think, and I'm just going to have to live with that. Like I said, if I forgot anything too bad, I'd rather not remember it.

I'd rather be Tobi than a mental patient.


End file.
